Going High And Low
A rant on Quiet Luxury, and a rambling love letter to trendless style and my navy sweatshirt.
Before I get into this unbelievably long rant about Quiet Luxury - a bit of news. I’m starting a SECOND newsletter, all about Mom things. Motherhood, identity, mom style, pregnancy style, birth stories, kid’s stuff, baby stuff, all things kid and mom related will mostly live here. It’s also going to be largely behind a paywall, because if I’m making a real go of this, I’ve gotta make a real go. So anyway, introducing Your Mom, and all my trashy hot takes on having kids & being a mother. The frequency that Earl Earl goes out will be a little less, but I think that’s a good thing. Still weekly, but probably just once. Anyway…
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There are certain phrases from my years working in magazines that still make me cringe. Pop of color. Insta-worthy. Desk to drinks (BARF!!!!!) And high/low mix. The concepts are valid, mostly, but the wording feels so….bippity boppity boo. You know? And we used those phrases all the time!
But anyway, the topic is high/low. I keep seeing articles, posts, tweets, probably morning show segments fawning over this HOT TREND…Quiet Luxury. And I 100% get a boner for minimalist brands like Jil Sander and The Row, and my favorite thing in the world is navy cashmere. It’s not the look I don’t like, rather the conversation around Quiet Luxury makes me feel so….icky.
It’s that a) it reeks of white supremacy - putting Euro-centric/old-money (white) ideals of “chic” on a pedestal as THE ONLY way to dress if you have good taste. I’ve written about that before. It’s obviously classist.
And b) I just can’t believe we’re still talking about style like this. Giving trends cute names, and suddenly it’s the only way. Hard pivot. A voice from above booming, AND NOW WE WILL ALL WEAR ~MUSHROOM BISQUE~, and it’s exactly the kind of “Trend” that makes people feel like why even bother trying. I mean, forget this specific trend, in every instance, what are we supposed to do - throw everything out that has a color or print, cash in your 401k and buy out your friendly neighborhood Brunello Cucinelli?
According to the media, there are two extremes right now in high-fashion: the very Instagrammy and single-use way of using head-to-toe looks to create a moment for a photo. In my opinion, it feels very disposable. On the other hand, there’s Quiet Luxury, and being so in the know, hush hush, winks and nods that you and yours end up like dogs chasing each other’s tails.
In both extremes, there’s very little room for actual personal style, or…here it is! - the “high/low” mix that I think makes style good. And by high/low, of course I mean high/low price price point AND high/low brow.
Can we be cheap and fancy and slutty and shy and dirty and snobby and silly and sad?
But still sometimes I start to kick myself for not being more personally cohesive, not being one of those girls with a color story and personal restraint. Being neither maximalist nor minimalist, workwear-inspired or luxe. I start to feel itchy in my skin - like maybe I’m actually NOT very good, or very smart, funny, valuable. AND THEN! Then, I remember those phrases were all just bullshit buzzwords we used to come up with in magazines to give ourselves something to talk about. Basically. Nobody lives like that, at least nobody I’d ever want to pal around with.
My point is: none of this stuff is real. Do your thing, don’t be a snob, wear your clothes. Do what you want, who cares what it’s called.
There’s so much to be said for finding something great and that really speaks to the deepest you there is, and sitting with that, whether it costs nothing, or an entire paycheck (or two). Not trying every trend or mirroring tricks just because you see someone else doing it. Experimentation is super fun, of course, but real style and self-awareness, I think, comes a bit from having blinders on and doing your own specific little dance. Swimming a stroke that only you know in a pool only you can find.
And part of that comes from a mix of all sorts of influences, origins, and price points. That old high/low baby.
Last week, Jordan Foster posted about my favorite sweatshirt of all time and I was FLOODED with requests for the link. It’s a great sweatshirt! I wear mine so much, it’s become an integral part of my personal style. I wear it with everything, and it really truly has defined the way I dress. So here’s my little love letter to it, and a few of the high and low ways I wear it. Thanks for sticking with me pals, WHOOSH.
LOW
To the playground! I know it’s just a sweatshirt and jeans, but something about the way it’s washed and worn-in makes it feel a bit more special and polished than a regular sweatshirt. I love that there’s no branding, and that the fit is neither fitted nor oversized. It’s men’s, and mine is a size Medium. And to be fair, I have no boobs, I’m fairly athletic, no waist, no hips, no butt, broad shoulders, zero curves. I’m built like a boy, so men’s clothes fit me easily, but everyone I know who has bought this sweatshirt loves it. My next paid subscriber letter will be on shopping the men’s section.
1. The sweatshirt! We love her. Comfort Colors, $37
2. If you’ve been reading for a while, you know these jeans. They’re my favorite. Inexpensive, no frills, no distressing, just good, clean non-stretch denim. I also like that they’re almost the same color as the sweatshirt - looks sleeker that way. Wrangler, $55
3. However! The Wranglers can be a tricky fit if you have curves. I like these for the similar crop and fit, but they have a cut that might be a bit easier. Citizens of Humanity, $228
4. The ballet flats I’m wearing! They have a nice cushiness on the bottom. Very simple and clean. Margaux, $225
5. I love the celery color of these. A perfect pairing with the dark blue denim and navy sweatshirt. Everlane, $140
6. I can’t stop thinking about these little ballet flats! They’d be so sweet with this outfit. Loeffler Randall, $250
7. The navy and white version of the tote I’m wearing here. Machine washable and big, it’s a great schlepping tote. J.Crew, $20
8. A $13 alternative to Kendall Roy’s Loro Piana cap. I think this is the same one I’m wearing. Very classic and says absolutely nothing about the wearer. Not luxe, not not luxe, just a very perfect version of a very necessary thing. Hat, $13
9. A great necklace! Lots of impact with not a huge investment. Laura Lombardi, $110
10. And then a really nice pair of tortoise cat eyes. Again, the kind of sunglasses that go with everything, every style, and will never be out of style. Cos x Linda Farrow, $175
MEDIUM
I love this skirt suit from Maria McManus so much, it toes the line perfectly between totally contemporary and early 00’s Ally McBeal. I get a lot of wear out of it, both together, and separately - the miniskirt is perfect, in my opinion, and my love for a longline blazer is well documented. But I love it with sneakers and my sweatshirt, to embrace the 2001 commuter vibes a little more literally. It’s casual, but polished, no extra embellishments, just it is what it is, clean and simple. I love the blazer tied around my waist too because it’s LA! It’s chilly, it’s hot, it’s everything all at once. Something tied around my waist also tones down an otherwise serious outfit in a more interesting way than, say, casual shoes or a tote bag.
Oops, I forgot to add the sweatshirt, but here’s the link again. Comfort Colors, $37
1. Ok, so the price here isn’t medium, but Maria’s collections are all made very sustainably and with the highest quality. If you’re able to shop her pieces, they’re very much worth it. Maria McManus blazer, $1,090
2. Ditto the skirt - not inexpensive, but perfectly made and sustainable. I love the trouser details.Maria McManus skirt, $450
3. You can totally get the same commuter effect with a classic trench. It might even look better than the suit, now that I think about it. Mango trench, $140
4. A very cute, very tidy miniskirt. Mango skirt, $80
5. I’m a huge fan of everything Dorsey, and I especially love this gold link bracelet. It has the look of a vintage piece, but is much more affordable, and still beautiful quality. The gold plated silver is a bit more spendy. Dorsey gold link, $290
6. Dorsey again! This time their signature lab-grown sapphire tennis bracelet. A classic. Dorsey tennis bracelet, $260
7. My favorite sneakers of all time! New Balance, $85
8. My second favorite! Nice and retro. Nike, $95
9. I don’t know why, but I’ve really become a Gucci logo gal recently. I like how obvious it is, but that it’s a vintage shape. This is the kind of bag you’d use until your daughter got old enough to steal it. Gucci, $2,980
HIGH (for me)
And now to a meeting! Sometimes I like to wear the sweatshirt with something fancier, but wear it inside out to dress it all down. That way it also looks like I don’t just wear the same thing every day. Here I’m wearing it with those Row pants I went hunting for back in January. They’re perfectly carrot-cut, with pleats that face inwards rather than out (I find this to be a little more sleek), and the exact right length. Then! With those Alaïa flats, and my Metier tote. All of those extra things are fancy, but then the inside-out sweatshirt makes it feel a little more casual and more personal.
1. Hi, it’s the sweatshirt again. Comfort Colors, $37
2. These are very close to my Row pants. Very, very close. Cos, $120
3. My other favorite pants of all time - these would also look great in this outfit. I love these leggings beyond love. The Row, $550
4. The exact flats I’m wearing here appear to be sold out everywhere, but I do enjoy these silly Alaïa-stocks with giant studs. Similar vibe, silly, silly, I love them.Alaïa, $1,090
5. A silver Mary Jane! Would also be so nice here, and also with the denim, now that I think about it. Larroudé, $315
6. A very similar vibe to my ballet flats. Nice and sparkly - these crystals are on a satin base, which makes them even more fancy. Khaite, $980
7. I just got this belt, and I haven’t really taken it off. It’s perfect. Great quality, looks cool with everything, not too preppy, not too punky, just again - a perfectly made simple thing. Labucq, $190
8. Not quite the same bag as mine, but same feeling and same brand. As far as quality goes, it doesn’t get better than Metier! The brand embodies the essence of quiet luxury, and is very insidery, but I think it’s better than the trend because they’re so useful, so durable, and so timeless.Metier, $1,950
9. I also have one of these canvas totes, and I use it all the time. Very preppy and cute, and adds a little something without overpowering your style. Leatherology, $170
10. And again! A perfect, simple chunky chain. You can hold charms on the main ring, which I love. Mejuri, $275
And that’s where we are. Subscribe to Your Mom for mom things, stay here for style things, upgrade to paid for more things. If you want.
I love you, I hope you feel good and are doing something fun somewhere.
Love,
Your friend,
Laurel
I said this earlier today, but the Quiet Luxury thing is just a rebrand of elegance. Like when plain old chicken stock became "bone broth" for $9 a cup at Brodo. To your point, it's media repackaging of an old idea that collides with pop culture in a timely way -- like when Succession is airing. I published a sardonic "low key rich bitch" capsule closet newsletter the other day and chimed in that overall, it's really just classic/trendless style that feels like a "safe" investment in precarious times. And if that's the look you're going for, elegant can be GAP jeans and a white shirt just as much as it can be a $6k coat from The Row. I suspect most of this discourse originated on TikTok, which is full of teenagers re-discovering stuff Millenials once loved and calling it something different/more blunt/an aesthetic.
But which the row pants did you end up going for??? (Loved that article)