Trying to get my shit together over here

Trying!

In the beginning of lockdown, I remember so many people setting goals for ways to use “this time” to be productive. Learning to cook! Learning French! Finally learning how to do a split! Cleaning out your closet! There’s definitely an impulse to be productive and creative, and feeling like finally we have the time we’re always asking for—just not the way we wanted it to happen. Be careful what you wish for!  

Since I left all my things back in New York last March, I’ve been doing some internal housekeeping. Cleaning out my mental drawers, vacuuming out the crumbs. I feel like my brain is the kitchen junk drawer, there are so many old packets of plastic takeout silverware I can never find a pen when I need it.

Me, unpacking my internal garbage.

If I had a penny for every time I heard a Millennial girl say she has anxiety…I’d have a shit ton of pennies. But! I have anxiety! And you probably do too! There’s a lot to feel anxious about! But I think I’ve kind of leaned on that as a crutch f…