Standing in the Sunshine

A note about the election.

I went to bed last night well before the results were in. I, like probably you, already knew. I needed my daughter, so I slipped into her little twin size bed and curled my body around hers. She’s so tiny, and so soft and warm, I fell asleep letting my gaze unfocus on the hill of her cheek - that was the self care I needed.

This morning, I saw the news, I put my kid’s outfits for the day in the dryer so they’d be warm when I changed them out of their PJ’s, I toasted them a bagel, put on their favorite podcast. I brought them to school, and I felt pretty resigned, like I had my shit under control. I knew I’d have to wait to fall apart when I was alone. Unfortunately, I made eye contact with my friend S on my way in - she’s one of the moms I spent the night texting with, and seeing her face (she’s tougher than I, and I could only see it in her eyes) broke me. As much as I didn’t want to, I started crying. I tried to hide it and walked my kids to their classes.

Afterwards, I went back to …