Fancy Mom Asks: What's a Good Swimsuit for Ladies of a Certain Age

We're keeping our tushies in and our heads held high!

I’m writing this while I watch Love Island, and the biggest thing I get hung up on while watching this show is…WHAT HAPPENED TO THE GIRLS’ SWIMSUITS?! When did it become standard to wear a thong? What! This makes me very happy to not be in my 20s now - it wasn’t a thing then!

Anyway, before my Fancy Mom left for Japan, we had a long conversation about swimwear. Swimsuits, man. We all need them, but nobody really wants to shop for one. And if you’re not in your twenties (or early thirties) it feels like 99% of what’s on the market and not hideous is not for you. It’s definitely a hole in the market. So what do you do if you want to swim and you’re ~of a certain age~? If you want a thong, or to wear the same red string bikini you’ve had forever DO IT!!! That is hotttttttt.

And if you don’t, or even if you ARE in your twenties or early thirties and you’d rather something a little less revealing that you can actually swim in - here we are. I say ~ladies of a certain age~ but none of this is really about age, it’s all about preference. And this little assortment I put together should help guide you towards something you love if you otherwise have a hard time finding what you need.

Here are some options for swimsuits and coverups, because not swimming in the ocean, not swimming on your dream vacation - that’s simply not an option. You must LIVE.

But still, we want big girl swimsuits for grown ups. We want our ass cheeks to stay IN our panties. We want support and structure, but we also want something genuinely beautiful and elegant and beautiful that isn’t mortifying and too old lady to wear confidently.